Who Am I?
by shinee2007
Summary: Lambo was never ordered to go to Tsuna's house to assassinate Reborn. Instead, he stays in the mansion. Sitting in his chamber with only a mirror to accompany him with, he questions himself... Who am I? Warning: Character death! Oneshot.


**Hi! Shinee2007 is here** **with another Lambo fic! **

**Please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Lambo or KHR or any of its characters. **

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**Who am I?**

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Who am I? I'm Lambo. No last name because I am not worthy of having "Bovino" as part of my name. Well, 'Lambo' is what mama called me before she died. Now, I'm called 'worthless shit', 'thing', and other names other than 'Lambo'.

Mama knew how I was treated. She knew how others called me and tried to get them to stop.

_"Lambo is the heir to this family! He should not be treated like this!" She yelled at boss. _At that time, I quivered and trembled, afraid of what boss would to Mama. Boss stomped up to her and slapped her across the face.

_"I will do whatever I want with that worthless shit, you hear me? One more word about this and you are…"_ he let the threat hang in the air. At that time, I had no idea what he meant, but mama knew. She stared at boss with fearful look.

_Mama stared at the ground and said, "I understand." _Ever since then, mama also got bullied by everyone. "Why are you protecting that trash" they say every time they bullied her. In the end, mama's bullying got too far and she no longer moved.

Now I am 'trash'; no longer 'Lambo'.

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**How do you smile?**

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I saw mama 'smiling' at me. That's what she told me she was doing. Her lips were upward and her eyes were squinting. She looked pretty. Yes, I think that's the right word.

'Smiling' seemed 'fun'. Mama told me what 'fun' was. It's where you enjoy what you are doing. Well, if that is what 'fun' is, I have 'fun' every day. I'm with mama after all. But… I never 'smiled' before. It was hard.

I stared at the reflection of myself in front of me. The emotionless boy with an afro is me. That is who I am.

_"Here, let me help you, Lambo." _With my index fingers, I forced my lips to smile like mama did to me in the past. Then, I dropped my hands immediately. It didn't look pretty like mama's smile.

Staring at the sky through the small window, that only could fit my face, water went down my face. What is this? That's right. Mama told me that it was tears and it is called 'crying' and we 'cry' when we are 'sad'.

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**What is love?**

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_"Love… It's where you feel all warm in your chest. Like when I see you, Lambo, I feel all warm right here." Mama pointed at her chest. _

I put my hand on my chest. It feels cold, but it's burning in the inside. Mama never told me it hurt when I feel loved… She never told me… It hurts like how boss hits me… or how butler-san glares at me.

Is this love? Mama said that it would be warm though, not burning. I don't know what it is anymore. I don't know. I 'miss' her.

That's the right word, right? Mama said that 'miss' meant that I want to see something again and I want to see mama. I really do.

Mama made me all warm and cuddly in the inside and that is love, right? Ever since she died, I no longer feel this… It just burns inside and wat- no, tears run down my face. Nobody hit me though… Nobody called me mean things, so why am I 'crying'?

Is this love? Mama… Mama… Can you tell me? Is this love?

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**What is a family?**

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Mama said that the family is mama and boss. She said that boss was my… 'papa'? I don't think that is true though.

I called boss 'papa' before and all he said was _"Don't call me that, trash! Why would I ever be your papa?"_ and hit me across the face.

She then rubbed my wound on the face and cried. She kept on apologizing to me over and over again. I wonder why though… Boss always hit me like that, just not the visible places. He also gives me clothes! It's a cow suit. It was uncomfortable at first but, now that I always wear it, I'm okay with it now.

Oh, then is boss really my papa? He did give me a present… Families give each other presents, right?

Boss said that he is not my papa so he must not be. Mama is a liar. Mama is my only family, right? Right?

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"Brat, get up. It's another 'lesson' time. Today, I'm going to teach you what 'pain' means." A man in black suit smirked at me as he brought out a pocket knife.

Emotionlessly, I stood up and walked up to him. I stared at him and he grimaced as he brought down the pocket knife to my face. I tore up my cow suit that boss gave me and hurt me even more.

I never made a sound as he did that though. I learned long time ago that if I do that, it'll hurt more.

"Get up, worthless trash. Get up." He growled when I collapsed on my knees. I bit my lower lip really hard, trying not to get water down my face. I slowly stood back up while closing my eyes for the next cut on my body, only for nothing to happen.

I slightly opened my eye and saw the man dropping the bloody pocket knife to the ground and unbuckling his belt. Chills went down my body and my mind went blank. I waited for the impact of the belt with my hands trembling hard. I really wanted this to stop.

'I know what 'pain' is… Please stop this lesson…' I wanted to shout, but I knew it would only get me in bigger trouble.

I thought about mama. I missed her. I wanted to see her. Throughout the rest of the lesson, I did not collapse again, neither did I say a word.

He looked very satisfied and walked out of the room, locking the door behind him with a click.

"Mama…" I whimpered in the dark chamber. Rolling into a ball and rocking back and forth, water ran down my face without any warning.

I blankly stared at the pocket knife on the ground. If I lose a lot of the red water in my body, would I be with mama? After all, there was lots of red water surrounding mama's body when she died. I want to be with mama.

Reaching out for the knife, I grabbed it. With trembling hand, I hovered it over my wrist. I wanted it to end… end… end…

I wanted to be with mama, not the butler-san or boss. I wanted the warm feeling in the chest, not the burning one… I wanted to see mama's 'smile' again. It was pretty… Mama… Mama… Where are you?

I stabbed myself on the wrist, stomach, and lastly, the chest. When I stabbed myself on the chest, the burning sensation in it stopped.

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_"Lambo…" Mama held out his arms to me. "Come here, Lambo."_

_I ran up to her and hugged her. "Mama!"_

_"Welcome home, Lambo." She smiled at me. _

_For the first time, I returned the smile. "I'm home, mama!"_

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**And that is the wrap!**

**Thank you for reading this and I hope you liked it!**

**Leave a review please. I would love to find out what you thought about it!**


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